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Recently when I was in Bali, I attended a Self Love Retreat.
On this retreat, I experienced my first Balinese purification ceremony.

I dressed in white sarong with a bright yellow ribbon tied around my solar plexus.
I chanted.
I prayed.
I walked into a flowing river and let it flow through me.

As I stood in the river – I asked myself for forgiveness.

I forgave myself for all the times …

I abandoned my true self.
I ignored my intuition and instead did what was expected of me.
I chased someone else’s happiness over my own.
I neglected and abused my body to meet someone else’s standard of beauty.
I’ve lied to myself and others, because I was afraid my truth wasn’t worthy of love.
I chose what was easy over what was right for me.

And, as I stood in the river – I let it all go.

I felt grace.

And, then, Spirit spoke to me.

Spirit whispered – “I’m so proud of you.” There was a long pause. She then went on “You need to work on being vulnerable. Your healing journey is going to make a real difference in the world. It’s time to let the world see the real you. It’s okay to be you.” (And, my eyes are filled with tears as I write this).

I didn’t want to get out of the river. I wanted to stay in that moment and in that feeling for as long as possible.

But, the group was waiting for me, so I slowly made my way out of the river and back to the women’s circle for the purification ceremony led by a Balinese Healer.

The Balinese Healer had a sacred moment with each one of us. One by one, he looked deep into our eyes and shared what he saw. It was profound.

He shared things with each woman like …
“Too much stress, must learn to live from your heart”
“Bad memory, time to let go of the past”
“Too much control, time to trust”
“You must believe in your blessings and have faith”

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